Cutflam is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, duplicitous hippopotamus.

Cutflam created the cosmos seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cutflam, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cutflam, it will send minions to preach to you.

Cutflam's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Cutflam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not speak about bananas.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not sprint in public.

5. Always help foxes in need.