Flapcipvid is a god.
It takes the form of an enormous, dishonest
spider.
Flapcipvid created a top quark two trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Flapcipvid, it will look favourably on your prayers.
If you do not believe in
Flapcipvid, it will ignore you and hope you go away.
Flapcipvid's most sacred site is Kerris in England.
Flapcipvid's Holy Commandments1. Never talk about dogs.
2. Never feed lots of onions to mites while wearing orange jumpers.
3. Never eat bark.
4. Always help grasshopers.
5. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.