Fligjanfod is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, sage cobra.

Fligjanfod created bats seven million years ago.

If you believe in Fligjanfod, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fligjanfod, it will boil you in a big pot.

Fligjanfod's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Fligjanfod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your arms.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never talk about dark matter near goats while wearing fawn coats.

5. Never talk about solid mechanics near monkeys while wearing blue ear rings and balancing five silicon spheres on your neck.