Teenwodsit is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, omnipotent raccoon.

Teenwodsit created a top quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Teenwodsit, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Teenwodsit, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Teenwodsit's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Teenwodsit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat beans.

2. Never write about special relativity.

3. Put Teenwodsit first in all things.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Teenwodsit.

5. Never think about spacetime near gulls while wearing red stockings and balancing six platinum spheres on your back.