Mutstiksaf is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, omniscient wren.

Mutstiksaf created parasitic wasps eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Mutstiksaf, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Mutstiksaf, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Mutstiksaf's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Mutstiksaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ants.

2. Learn six new languages a year.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Erect nine nickel sculptures of Mutstiksaf on top of important buildings.

5. Respect your elders.