Vadnibrak is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, impressive porpoise.

Vadnibrak created a strange quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Vadnibrak, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Vadnibrak, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Vadnibrak's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Vadnibrak's Holy Commandments

1. Vadnibrak loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

4. Do not keep three gulls in a large pit.

5. Do not kill aardvarks.