Hanlagrut is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, weak shark.

Hanlagrut created time and space six million years ago.

If you believe in Hanlagrut, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hanlagrut, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Hanlagrut's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Hanlagrut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair gray.

2. Retreat if seven snakes approach from the east.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Hanlagrut in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never sprint near moths.