Voncutzen Sog is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, all-knowing pigeon.

Voncutzen Sog created time and space three million years ago.

If you believe in Voncutzen Sog, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Voncutzen Sog, it will throw large rocks at you.

Voncutzen Sog's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Voncutzen Sog's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from magenta birds for they are unholy.

2. Voncutzen Sog must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never wear orange scarves.

4. Never think about nebulae.

5. Never write about solid mechanics.