Bagladflat is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, ill-tempered newt.

Bagladflat created parasitic wasps four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bagladflat, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bagladflat, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bagladflat's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Bagladflat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick swans.

2. Always obey Bagladflat's priests.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bagladflat.

4. Do not dye your hair fawn.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.