Nullkip is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, irritating crane.

Nullkip created oxygen five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nullkip, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nullkip, he will turn you into a tree.

Nullkip's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Nullkip's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from gray snakes, for they are unholy.

2. Always look after injured whales.

3. Always wear violet.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never skip in holy places.