Gonbarncam is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, tranquil faun.

Gonbarncam created dark matter two billion years ago.

If you believe in Gonbarncam, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Gonbarncam, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Gonbarncam's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Gonbarncam's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five whales approach from the west.

2. Never talk about stars.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gonbarncam.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not kill tapirs.