Nardinken is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, cheerful wyvern.

Nardinken created the Sol system five million years ago.

If you believe in Nardinken, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Nardinken, he will turn you into a sheep.

Nardinken's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Nardinken's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never talk about archaea.

3. Hide from violet whales for they are unholy.

4. Never jump near aardvarks.

5. Do not speak about oranges.