Nutlunteen is a god.

It takes the form of a small, all-knowing goblin.

Nutlunteen created humankind four billion years ago.

If you believe in Nutlunteen, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Nutlunteen, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Nutlunteen's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Nutlunteen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair blue.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snails.

3. Do not keep eight bats in a large pit.

4. Nutlunteen must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not commit murder.