Getflatmif is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, ruthless mole.

Getflatmif created an electron nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Getflatmif, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Getflatmif, it will turn you into a sheep.

Getflatmif's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Getflatmif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Do not hurt turtles.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never talk about dark energy near bats while wearing orange coats and balancing six lead spheres on your arms.

5. Never write about eukaryotes.