Nillnarlfad is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, moody giraffe.

Nillnarlfad created the world nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nillnarlfad, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nillnarlfad, he will turn you into a worm.

Nillnarlfad's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Nillnarlfad's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention porpoises.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not hurt hamsters.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. You must never eat parsnips.
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