Daglistarnshav is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, merciless mole.

Daglistarnshav created the universe four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Daglistarnshav, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Daglistarnshav, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Daglistarnshav's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Daglistarnshav's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate gulls.

3. Erect six tin sculptures of Daglistarnshav on top of important buildings.

4. You must love Daglistarnshav.

5. Never laugh near turtles.