Poghuglarg is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, dishonourable warg.

Poghuglarg created a bottom quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Poghuglarg, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Poghuglarg, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Poghuglarg's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Poghuglarg's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never think about ultrasonics near porpoises while wearing blue shirts and balancing five silicon spheres on your back.

3. Never talk about swans.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Put Poghuglarg first in all things.