Rapbidbed is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, generous fairy.

Rapbidbed created matter six billion years ago.

If you believe in Rapbidbed, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Rapbidbed, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Rapbidbed's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Rapbidbed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Learn five new languages a year.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Do not wear fawn clothing.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.