Lantargpang is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, benevolent bear.

Lantargpang created a bottom quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lantargpang, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lantargpang, she will ignore you.

Lantargpang's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Lantargpang's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear zinc on your body.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.