Nadzedlist Nartkaphim is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, wise faun.

Nadzedlist Nartkaphim created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nadzedlist Nartkaphim, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nadzedlist Nartkaphim, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Nadzedlist Nartkaphim's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Nadzedlist Nartkaphim's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry swans.

2. Do not wear tin on your body.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.