Fenstipdag is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, temperamental penguin.

Fenstipdag created the Sombrero Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Fenstipdag, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fenstipdag, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Fenstipdag's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Fenstipdag's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Fenstipdag.

2. Never mention mice.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fenstipdag.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate bats.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity.