Cadzimril is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, idiotic newt.

Cadzimril created a charm quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cadzimril, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Cadzimril, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Cadzimril's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Cadzimril's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about enzymes.

2. Cadzimril must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.