Narlhakpon is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unthinking rhinoceros.

Narlhakpon created the Milkyway four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Narlhakpon, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Narlhakpon, she will remove you from existence.

Narlhakpon's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Narlhakpon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

5. Never talk about chlorophyll.