Wandutflan Pidpadgomgig Wothugtetti is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, effective penguin.

Wandutflan Pidpadgomgig Wothugtetti created carbon nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wandutflan Pidpadgomgig Wothugtetti, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Wandutflan Pidpadgomgig Wothugtetti, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Wandutflan Pidpadgomgig Wothugtetti's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Wandutflan Pidpadgomgig Wothugtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear corsets.

2. You must love Wandutflan Pidpadgomgig Wothugtetti.

3. Never think ill of sick dolphins.

4. Never write about spacetime.

5. Never mention tapirs.