Omindunmip is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, idiotic grasshopper.

Omindunmip created light three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Omindunmip, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Omindunmip, he will turn you into a tree.

Omindunmip's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Omindunmip's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry foxes.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Voles are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never write about photosynthesis.

5. Always help squirrels in need.