Staf is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, humorless wyvern.

Staf created the Small Magellanic Cloud six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Staf, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Staf, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Staf's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Staf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat figs.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not hurt ducks.

4. Always obey Staf's priests.

5. Put Staf first in all things.