Rutyognut is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, confident dove.

Rutyognut created the planet Saturn seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rutyognut, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Rutyognut, he will laugh at you.

Rutyognut's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Rutyognut's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large copper sculpture of Rutyognut on top of all buildings.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Rutyognut.

5. Never think about special relativity near tortoises while wearing gray shorts and balancing three aluminium spheres on your head.