Dapbepcun is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, clever naga.

Dapbepcun created carbon eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapbepcun, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Dapbepcun, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Dapbepcun's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Dapbepcun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Always help sick nematodes.

4. Do not kill capybaras.

5. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.