Wapmobsaf is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, proud bird.

Wapmobsaf created viruses two years ago.

If you believe in Wapmobsaf, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Wapmobsaf, it will turn you into a mole.

Wapmobsaf's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Wapmobsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Feed all hungry monkeys.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never think about dark energy near snails while wearing gray stockings and balancing eight lead spheres on your chest.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.