Nillwikyar is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, idiotic octopus.

Nillwikyar created the Milkyway three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nillwikyar, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nillwikyar, it will turn you into a goat.

Nillwikyar's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Nillwikyar's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no doves in a building before entering it.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Do not keep eight tortoises in a large pit.

4. Always wear blue.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics.