Quafspag is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, prudent hyena.

Quafspag created vertebrates eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quafspag, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Quafspag, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Quafspag's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Quafspag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not kill birds.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Do not trade with those who eat parsnips.

5. Do not commit murder.