Wipsislig Dissloopdam is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, impressive jaguar.

Wipsislig Dissloopdam created a Higgs boson three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wipsislig Dissloopdam, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Wipsislig Dissloopdam, it will turn you into a duck.

Wipsislig Dissloopdam's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Wipsislig Dissloopdam's Holy Commandments

1. Learn three new languages a year.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never talk about snakes.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. You must never eat beans.