Fidjantiklop is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, proud warg.

Fidjantiklop created Mount Everest nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fidjantiklop, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fidjantiklop, he will destroy your home solar system.

Fidjantiklop's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Fidjantiklop's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Fidjantiklop.

2. Never feed strawberries to aardvarks while wearing gray kilts.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Feed all hungry manatees.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.