Quartzedjam is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, clever bat.

Quartzedjam created a down quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Quartzedjam, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Quartzedjam, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Quartzedjam's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Quartzedjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about aubergines.

2. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

3. Never talk about enzymes.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.