Tomcipbid is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, confident armadillo.

Tomcipbid created a Higgs boson four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tomcipbid, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tomcipbid, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Tomcipbid's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Tomcipbid's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about chromosomes.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Do not eat tomatoes.

4. Hide if eight sheep approach from the north.

5. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.