Fagbutril is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, happy seal.

Fagbutril created energy five million years ago.

If you believe in Fagbutril, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Fagbutril, she will turn you into a frog.

Fagbutril's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Fagbutril's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about chlorophyll.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never talk about hamsters.

4. Never laugh near moths.

5. Always wear indigo.