Nartflatpop is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, ruthless duck.

Nartflatpop created a charm quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Nartflatpop, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Nartflatpop, he will destroy your home planet.

Nartflatpop's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Nartflatpop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always make sure there are no snakes in a building before entering it.

3. Put Nartflatpop first in all things.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not drink alcohol.