Jarnfligwat is a god.
It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, sage
duck.
Jarnfligwat created the planet Earth eight trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Jarnfligwat, it will make you lucky.
If you do not believe in
Jarnfligwat, it will denounce you as a heretic.
Jarnfligwat's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.
Jarnfligwat's Holy Commandments1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Jarnfligwat.
2. Never write about asteroids.
3. Look mercifully on unfortunate bats.
4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.
5. Hide from purple tapirs for they are unholy.