Quafranrull is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, dishonest hamster.

Quafranrull created the Virgo Supercluster five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quafranrull, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Quafranrull, he will jump up and down on your head.

Quafranrull's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Quafranrull's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five snakes approach from the south.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate bats.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Quafranrull.

4. Do not speak about bananas.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.