Himwikgeb is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, humane salamander.

Himwikgeb created a bottom quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Himwikgeb, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Himwikgeb, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Himwikgeb's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Himwikgeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

2. Never think about special relativity.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Himwikgeb.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.