Dodquatcam is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, temperamental ant.

Dodquatcam created time and space six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dodquatcam, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Dodquatcam, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Dodquatcam's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Dodquatcam's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from gray mice for they are unholy.

2. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dodquatcam.

5. Always obey Dodquatcam's priests.