Tiflopfig is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, happy chinchilla.

Tiflopfig created Asia seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tiflopfig, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Tiflopfig, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Tiflopfig's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Tiflopfig's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never think about thermodynamics.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Do not drink alcohol.