Cepfet is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, almighty swallow.

Cepfet created snails nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cepfet, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Cepfet, she will turn you into a worm.

Cepfet's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Cepfet's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Hide if nine sheep approach from the north.

4. Do not wear platinum on your body.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.