Dogbimran is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, boastful eagle.

Dogbimran created matter nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dogbimran, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dogbimran, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Dogbimran's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Dogbimran's Holy Commandments

1. Cats are not to be trusted.

2. Never skip near shrews.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never think ill of sick hamsters.