Bessdobtomaf is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, uncaring chinchilla.

Bessdobtomaf created tapeworms seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bessdobtomaf, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Bessdobtomaf, it will throw large rocks at you.

Bessdobtomaf's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Bessdobtomaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Do not hurt moths.

3. Never jump in holy places.

4. Never talk about aardvarks.

5. Always help sick sharks.