Bapcudceb is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, vain manatee.

Bapcudceb created a Higgs boson eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bapcudceb, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bapcudceb, it will not invite you to parties.

Bapcudceb's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Bapcudceb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

2. Hide if three monkeys approach from the east.

3. Always obey Bapcudceb's priests.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never play with disobedient children.