Sadkopfly is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, merciful grasshopper.

Sadkopfly created viruses two billion years ago.

If you believe in Sadkopfly, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Sadkopfly, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Sadkopfly's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Sadkopfly's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Erect a giant turquoise sculpture of Sadkopfly in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never talk about special relativity near cats while wearing yellow corsets and balancing nine carbon spheres on your back.

5. Never jump in holy places.