Monsatnur Bassfudranarm is a god.

She takes the form of a large, pitiless wolf.

Monsatnur Bassfudranarm created a bottom quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Monsatnur Bassfudranarm, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Monsatnur Bassfudranarm, she will not care at all.

Monsatnur Bassfudranarm's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Monsatnur Bassfudranarm's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair purple.

2. Never write about stars.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Monsatnur Bassfudranarm.

5. Do not kill mites.