Negzakfot is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, intelligent giraffe.

Negzakfot created the planet Saturn eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Negzakfot, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Negzakfot, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Negzakfot's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Negzakfot's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never talk about black holes.

3. Never skip in the presence of nematodes.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.