Bemfarbim Flambanwit is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, amazing dingo.

Bemfarbim Flambanwit created a strange quark four years ago.

If you believe in Bemfarbim Flambanwit, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bemfarbim Flambanwit, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Bemfarbim Flambanwit's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Bemfarbim Flambanwit's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never feed lots of wheat to monkeys while wearing cyan corsets.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not speak about strawberries.